Jane Culpan
From Tecumsehs
| Jane "Dr. Goodhands" Culpan | |
 Mea Culpan | |
| Position: | 1B |
|---|---|
| First season: | prefer not to say |
| Likes: | Sweetly thrown balls |
| Dislikes: | assessing sweaty groin strains |
| Team responsibilities: | tournament chef |
First donned a softball glove at age 8 but after joining the Tecumsehs took whole a season to realise that the arc of the slow pitched ball was deliberate and not simply that English players could not pitch a softball to save their lives. Spent a few more years in the outfield watching and waiting for Captain Naomi to move to Scotland in order to play first base. This girl may not be fast but she gets there. From this long and yet somehow unremarkable involvement with the game there are some insights into the mystery of goodhand's approach to first base which may be of interest.
First base is different from the other infield positions in several ways. The largest difference is that you're involved in nearly every ball hit to an infielder. You're required to catch balls that may or may not be thrown accurately and you're expected to make difficult "scoops" look routine. You'll do less throwing than the other infielders but when you do throw, it won't usually be an easy play and will need to be accurate. If a fielder makes a terrible throw and allows the runner to be safe, immediately tell them not to worry about it. You want your fielders to be confident in their throws at all times. Even work in phrases like "Don't worry about that, I shoulda had it." A good teammate will appreciate this. A good teammate will also respond with an offer of free beer by way of apology. Every time you make a nice scoop or stretch, your infielders will love you more and more. Return the congratulations whenever they make a nice play or send sweet balls your way. Talk to the people who reach base. All first basemen do it and it's fun. Once you get used to this, you'll be bored at other positions where there's nobody to talk to. It's also a good way to get to know other players around your league. Throw in the occasional hug or goodhands grope just to keep them on their toes... know what I mean? Finally to all you short stops out there... don't ever give your first baseman a bat inside the pub and coach her on how to improve her swing. Just don't... ever. See you on first, cheers, Goodhands PhD.
